Finding and Keeping the Honest Friends

honesst friends by John Lennon

Finding and keeping good friends is a matter of trust and being honest. John Lennon once made a statement about this. He said “Being honest may not get you a lot of friends but it will always get you the right ones.”

By understanding human nature, you will understand why this statement rings true, for nearly everyone. Nobody grows up intending to lie or to say things they don’t believe, but it happens.

Finding the right friends starts with feeling good about yourself. If you believe in yourself and have confidence, you won’t have a desire to have several friends, rather than a few close, trusting friends you can count on. People sometimes look to their social circles, to boost confidence and feel important. This often backfires, because others may tell them only what they want to hear, for fear of being forgotten. Good friends will have the confidence to tell you what they believe. They are confident enough to be truthful, though they can also be tactful in telling the truth. You will feel more confident in their presence, to speak your own mind and live your life they way you want. True friends appreciate the individualistic traits, strengths, and weaknesses that make each person unique.

Honesty is about being true. Those who are stable in their own lifestyles and have plenty of balance in their lives, are more likely to be honest about everything. They don’t need to seek out others, to boost confidence. They accomplish plenty, but also know how to balance work, family, and social lives. They don’t have time for making up stories or falsifying information. When people are satisfied with their accomplishments, they don’t feel the need to falsify information, to make themselves appear more successful, richer, or more accomplished. They are essentially happy with their lives and can help others find the positive in their own lives.

Honest friends can help you avoid major mistakes. They will tell you without hesitation, if the new love interest is not right or if a job offer may not be for you. They are genuinely interested in others and get to know them better. So, they will likely learn all about you and will know what suits you, as opposed to which choices are all wrong. They are able to do this without prejudice, because they use their heads, rather than emotions, to help others with difficult choices or situations.

Honest friends are worth their weight in gold. They can help you avoid making mistakes. But, they can also listen, if you simply need someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on. You may not always like what they have to say. If you want to keep good friends, you will need to learn to be somewhat think skinned. This is especially true when you have friends who like to voice their opinions often. Good friends won’t belittle or cut you down. They are more likely to be supportive of your life goals and aspirations. Having a few friends who provide moral support and use good judgement when offering advice are more pleasant to be around, due to their positive outlook. This is why it’s better to have a few friends who believe in being honest, than having dozens of friends who don’t want the truth and are afraid to tell the truth.